The past several years have shown remarkable growth in the number of families in the MCO – and this growth means a whole new set of questions for the orchestra. As a result, special regulations have been introduced for MCO musicians with children, to provide some help in financial and organisational aspects.
«When the MCO was founded, it was one of the most important things in my life», says Paulien Holthuis, who has, meanwhile, become the mother of a three-year-old daughter, Tamar. «Today, Tamar and my husband Richard are, of course, more important to me, and I’m very happy that there is a way to enjoy both my family and playing in the MCO, which is still a kind of treasure in my life.» Michiel Commandeur, also a member since the founding, adds: «I used to live a lot more casually, it’s only since I have my family that I have developed a certain need for security.» Michiel already has two children, Stan, four, and Suse, nearly two. For both musicians, life in the MCO has become very different, as the combination of family and orchestra requires a high degree of organisational ability and flexibility. Whether the family joins the musician on tour or remains at home, each project must be organised well from A to Z. An MCO musician with children has to decide very early which projects he will play and consider whether it makes sense to bring family with him or not. In order to decide, he has to know whether there are enough apartments or large hotel rooms available, what the exact rehearsal schedule will be, whether orchestra meetings are planned, and whether other families with children will also be there.
«Paulien and I plan together a lot and we try to stay near to one another so that we can share toys and trade off on babysitting», says Katarzyna Wozniakowska, who brings her son Bruno, nearly three years old, and her husband Filip with her whenever possible. Like Paulien and Michiel, she plays in the second violin section and confirms that the decision whether or not to participate in a project very much depends on such criteria – and on whether the musician’s partner can react flexibly. Tamar and Bruno’s fathers are self-employed or have very flexible working conditions, so that they can often join their wives and children on tour.
On tour, the daily life of a musician with family is very different from that of colleagues with no children. When there are no rehearsals going on, families take joint trips to the playground, and evenings are generally spent at home with the kids. During rehearsals, accompanying partners watch the children; sometimes they come to the rehearsal hall and listen for a while. «Our colleagues are very open and warm, they know our kids, they ask how they’re doing, and they’re always happy to see them», Paulien notes. «Daniel loves children, he knows them all and he is very good with them.» Support from the orchestra members, Daniel Harding, and the management is very important for the musician parents, since it makes daily life on tour and the preparations for a tour much easier. «As the new rules for parents were introduced, almost everyone voted for them,» says Michiel, «and the office helps us out a lot – they take care of booking our apartments, for instance.» The children profit from the atmosphere: «Bruno has dozens of aunts and uncles in the orchestra. Right now he is interested in drums, and when Martin (timpanist of the MCO) saw this, he took him back and let him try out the instruments», Katarzyna relates. She also sees other advantages for children in a touring lifestyle: «Their senses become more aware, they notice so many more things, and I always notice that Bruno has taken a step forward after he has been on tour. He has also taken literal developmental ‹steps› during tours: he started crawling in Lucerne and he took his first steps in Japan.»
The special flexibility of the MCO seems to rub off on the children. They are very quick to adapt to the conditions of a particular place, they enjoy meeting other MCO children, and they also have friendships with many musicians. Adèle Harding, the daughter of Daniel Harding and Principal Violist Béatrice Muthelet, is a real tour expert. She regularly joins her parents on projects, though since she has started school she can only come during school vacation. Adèle’s godmother Chiara Tonelli plays in the MCO, and Adèle herself enjoys playing with the office staff, but she is especially happy when another child of similar age is there, for example Antoine, the son of stage manager Lionel Freuchet and the violin soloist Isabelle Faust. Adèle is not fazed by small difficulties along the way: if luggage gets lost, she gets on just as well without her toys. She finds it especially nice to have mummy or daddy to herself on tour; at home she has to share them with her little brother George: «You always have to chase after him, because he loves running away so much.»
The reality that parent musicians in the MCO live is something that many people in other jobs only dream of: the possibility to combine career, mobility and family. Even if daily life is sometimes exhausting, the musicians still agree that the MCO is forward-thinking when it comes to accommodating families. «A lot of people don’t believe me when I tell them that it’s no problem to bring Bruno and Filip with me on tour. I really think that the MCO can set an example in this respect – but I don’t know how many people really want to live the way we do?» Katarzyna considers, as she watches Bruno bargain over a balloon with an Italian child in Reggio Emilia.
The topic will certainly remain in the forefront for the MCO for the time being. Having children is catching, as the second violin section proves: «In our section almost every player has children. And I would claim that you can hear it», says one musician who knows what he’s talking about.
